"Living with Complex PTSD and ADHD: Melody Kane on Healing, Grief, and Disappearing to Kenya for Three Years"
Growing up in a dysfunctional home, enduring abuse and racism, and juggling single motherhood after an abusive relationship, Melody Kane found her passion in DJing, touring the world while battling imposter syndrome. After losing her parents and best friend, she sought healing during three transformative years in Kenya.
Melody grew up in a tumultuous home marked by her parents' unresolved traumas. "There was verbal and physical abuse.
The violence and dysfunction at home, combined with societal racism, profoundly shaped her sense of self. She carried this into adulthood, entering a relationship with a much older man at 17, the father of her child. "Looking back, I can see I was groomed," she says, recounting the abuse she endured during and after her pregnancy.
Born in a small seaside town in West Sussex, Melody Kane’s story is one of resilience through adversity.
Her Jamaican mother, part of the Windrush generation, was a nurse—independent, eloquent, and intelligent. Her English father, a Birmingham-born lorry driver, met her mother at a party and was instantly captivated. "He said he’d never met anyone like her," Melody recalls. They married and moved to East Preston, a predominantly white, middle-class town, where polite but pervasive racism marked their lives.
Becoming a single mother at 19, Melody juggled multiple jobs to provide for her daughter.
But amid the chaos, music became her sanctuary. By her mid-20s, she discovered DJing and quickly built a name for herself in a male-dominated industry. With mentorship, she toured the world, performing at festivals and events. Yet, despite her success, Melody struggled with imposter syndrome. "I’d be on stage performing, then backstage feeling like I didn’t belong," she shares.
COVID-19 forced Melody to confront herself. Therapy revealed she was living with complex PTSD and ADHD.
"It was like a lightbulb moment," she says. Around this time, she faced immense personal loss—her mother, father, and best friend passed away in quick succession. Her best friend, a man she describes as her "rock," left a void that deepened her sense of grief. Feeling overwhelmed and lost, Melody decided to move to Kenya in search of healing. The decision wasn’t random—she had long felt a pull toward the continent, and Kenya, with its natural beauty and rich cultural heritage, seemed like the right place to reconnect with herself. "There’s a grounding energy in Kenya that I hadn’t felt in a long time," she explains. The slower pace of life allowed her to detach from the relentless pressures of the industry and societal expectations.
Kenya became a sanctuary where Melody could strip away external distractions and focus inward.
"I’d sit in silence, surrounded by nature, and just allow myself to feel," she shares. The sense of community she experienced in Kenya also played a significant role in her healing. "There’s a collective warmth, a sense of belonging that I hadn’t felt anywhere else," she says. Unlike the isolating individualism she often felt in the UK, Kenya offered her connection—to others, to the land, and to herself.
The cultural emphasis on balance and holistic living resonated deeply with her. "There’s an understanding here that life isn’t perfect, and that’s okay," she reflects. The experience taught her to accept her grief and imperfections, rather than constantly trying to fight them. "Healing isn’t about fixing everything; it’s about learning to live with it," she says.
While Melody admits she’s not fully healed…
Kenya has given her the tools and space to move forward. "Healing isn’t linear, but I’m getting there," she says with quiet determination.
Melody’s story is not just about survival but about transformation. Through her music, her resilience, and her journey of self-discovery, she reminds us of the power of perseverance and the importance of choosing ourselves.
Follow Melody’s healing journey as she travels between London and Kenya, transforming her pain into power. Watch the full interview to hear her story in her own words, and follow her on Instagram to stay connected.